Last Updated: 6/22/99 9:33:59 PM
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Here is an example of the old style.

Bombs don't kill people, explosions kill people.
Can you repeat the part after "Listen very carefully"?
Cause of crash: Inadvertent contact with the ground.
Constant change is here to stay.
Daddy, what does "Formatting Drive C:" mean?
Death is 99 per cent fatal to laboratory rats.
Don't play stupid with me! I'm better at it.
Downgrade your system for only 89 dollars! Install Windows!
Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
Friction can be a drag sometimes
Gravity brings me down
Guns don't kill people..., I kill people!
Help stamp out, eliminate and abolish redundancy!
How come there's only one Monopolies Commission?
How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise MY hand!
I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
I had a life once... now I have a computer and a modem.
I tried being reasonable once. I didn't like it.
I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I'm perfect.
I'm not lost, I'm "locationally challenged."
I've run out of sick leave so I'm calling in dead.
If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
I've got Parkinson's disease. And he's got mine.
Illiterate? Write for free help.
It is bad luck to be superstitious
It works better if you plug it in.
Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get me!
Keyboard Not Found - Press [F1] to Continue
My reality check just bounced
NO! Taco Bell is NOT the Mexican Phone Company!
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
Nothing is impossible for anyone impervious to reason
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
One atom bomb can really ruin your day
Plankton lobbyist: "NUKE THE WHALES!"
SYSTEM ERROR: press F13 to continue...
Smokey the Bear says, "Strip mining prevents forest fires!"
Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (yep/Nope)
Supernovae are a Blast
The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity
The world is coming to an end. Please log off.
They told me I was gullible ... and I believed them!
Truth is just another misconception
Try? Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.
Volcano -- a mountain with hiccups
What color is a chameleon on a mirror?
When in doubt, think.
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Windows is *NOT* a virus. Viruses *DO* something!
Windows isn't CrippleWare -- it's "Functionally Challenged".
Without Time, everything would happen at once.